Surprise! I'm in Joplin, MO

I guess most probably thought I wouldn't post another adventure until next summer.  Well, guess again.  I am in Joplin, Missouri on the Skillman Labor Day Weekend Mission Trip.  We are working with Hearts & Hammers to help rebuild the city.

I rode with Debbie and Josue from Dallas.  We had a great time in the car.  The memories we created will never be forgotten.  From "Mariah Kia" to "Squar-rel."  We are already in for a great time.  We arrived last night at 9pm.  After checking in at the Microtel Hotel, we had a brief meeting and then headed off to dinner at Ruby Tuesdays.  Joel joined us at that point.  After dinner, Debbie and Josue picked up a few items from Walmart.  This was so much fun!  It felt like we were in college again.  I just hope we didn't get posted on PeopleofWalmart.com.

I didn't get the name of the person who owned the home that we worked on. We has an interesting time. Josh S. was out foreman and he did a great job. My first task was to install a vanity (hang a mirror) in the bathroom. Donna and I drilled the same holes eight different times, but we completed the task in the estimated time.

Next,we spent time helping where we were needed. We installed wood bases, measured boards for millworker and installed a large countertop. I found myself laying on top of the counter at one point. I was inside of a cabinet at another. The most important part was that we worked as a team. Each of us did our part to make sure this owner came home to a comfortable place after the ordeal they had been through.

At devotion that evening, Joel talked about the mindset of the people we are working for.  In summary.  He said the people we were working with were tired.  Not like after a long days work, but after an extended period of removal and unfamiliarity.  Imagine waking up everyday and having to make multiple decisions to get your life back 'on track.'  After awhile, you forget what 'on track' looks like.  The individuals we are working for have reached the point where small decisions (like choosing a paint color) are hard because they are beyond drained.  Our presence can alleviate some of the stress on them.

For these next few days, we have opted to make these decisions for them and with them.  We have taken on their problems to lift them up and bring them back to a sense of normalcy.  For some of the tornado victims, it was easy to bounce back.  For others, it has been so long (over a year later) that hope has been drained.

"Bear ye one another's burdens and so fulfill the law of Christ."- Galatians 6:2

Esperanza para Honduras

I just could not sleep past 6:30. I woke three time before then and finally gave in. I dressed, brushed and began to complete my packing. The end of the trip has arrived and I realize I want to do more. I feel a small impact with every act of service, but I think I my gift lies in working with kids.

Joel has talked with Marc about the activities for our next visit. They include renovations to the church and the boy's home. He told us this last night as we 'debriefed' the group from Skillman.

Our journey home was no piece of cake. At first, we thought we'd miss breakfast and rush our goodbyes. But we were just being anxious.  When will we learn to live more like the Hondurans? We arrived with ample time before departure, however our plane was not ready for us. When we finally took off, we were twenty minutes behind schedule. Obviously, this stressed me.

Upon arrival in Miami, we made a mad dash for passport control. Ben, Clark and I turned it into a footrace. In retrospect, that was not a good idea considering my hamstring has been bothering me. Our group got split at baggage claim, but eventually we all boarded the plane.

As we de-boarded in Dallas,  we were greeted with open arms by everyone. There were cheers, hugs and smiles. We were happy to be back, but part of my heart will always be with those I met in Hondo!

The trip is over and all I can do is think about the impacts of our work. Not only on the lives of the people we served, but on us as well. Specifically, I am thinking of how it has affected my ideology.

Recently, I have struggled with God allowing suffering. I just can't fathom a loving God that would allow the innocent to feel pain at random. Through no fault of their own, but pure chance they are dropped into environments where poverty, hunger, disease and abuse are regular parts of life. While others live a life a prosperity, gluttony, health and peace. Why?

In discussing this with a close friend, they concluded (not ultimately) that is it hard to bring another being into this fallen world. I could not help but agree. I would not want to be part of a system that set the innocent on a path of sure failure. It seems selfish, conceited and evil.

I struggle but this trip has given me hope. Maybe I am focusing too much on the pain in these situations and not enough on the progress. Wherever there is an Anahi- poor, afraid and alone. There is someone like Jessica- joyous, loving and persevering. There are Gabriels, but there are also Minors to look after him. You have people like Karol and Kelin. Due to their faith in God, they have found the fortitude to deal with the hand they were dealt. Now, they are both in college working to become more than their past. Through love and support of Marc they will be in a position to do someone about their surroundings.

I have not reconciled the existence of the cosmic lottery. But I have found that focus and faith in God's plan, the love of Christ and the strength of the Holy Spirit can get us through.

Thank you for supporting my blog this year. I look forward to writing more as things develop. God bless you all.

"For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope."- Jeremiah 29:11

¿Por qué esto existe?

Transition is the only constant in Hondo. The last of the Tennessee group leaves today. Lydia and her family have been so sweet and hard working. I plan to keep up with them.

The groups from Childress, Texas and Oklahoma started arriving today. Currently, there are fifty of them, but that number is going to grow. They are friendly, but it is hard to get to know so many in such a short time Karol and Kelin are going to have their hands full.

As I reflect, I don't think I have given Karol and Kelin due attention in my writings. These two sisters have been guides on everyday trip Skillman has taken. These two have been so wonderful to all of us. I am sure we wear them down, but they never complain and we have a lot of in with them. Both of them are in college. Karol is studying to be and Industrial Engineer. Kelin is studying to be an Environment Engineer. Working for Marc in the summers gives them a difficult schedule, but they seem to be doing well. I know that they can do well and go far.

Karol & Kelin

Today is an easy day. We visit the boy's home. We'll play with them for awhile and maybe have lunch. Then we go to the Valley of Angels to be tourists. On the way to the boy's home, we are stopping at the hospital to drop off a microwave for Nurse Lydia.

I was completely wrong about how 'easy' this day would be. I have been to the boy's home before, but I always assumed the boys had done something to be there. I didn't know they were there through no fault of their own. The part that got me was the timing of the following stories:

First, I met Moises. He told me he wanted to learn English. It was nice to talk to him because he understood that I was still learning Spanish.  We both tried very hard.  He began telling me that is friend lived in Houston, Texas. He was deported to Honduras because his family did not have the money to care for him. Thus, he landed in the home.

"Malo suerte", he said.

Next, I learned about Gabriel. He is from Roatan and speaks excellent English. He is in the home because his entire family died. Olivia (16, from Overland Park) told me that he could be in the home for three months, then he has to find a place on his own.  I couldn't hear any more because it was going to make me cry.  I found Kristin's hand and shoulder and sobbed uncontrollably. She graciously let me soak her shoulder and talked me through it.

I was able to compose myself and go outside to play with the boys. Josue was there for me to talk it out, but I just wasn't ready to do it without breaking down again. I can barely see the keyboard because my eyes are tearing as I type.  These facts are so difficult to take in.

Finally, I talked with Minor. I met him early on while buying bracelets, but this was the first time I talked with him and saw him 'work.' Each time we made balloon animals, the children wanted to keep the pumps. Minor asked to pump his own balloon. Reluctantly, I handed him the pump and he made a balloon for himself. Then he saw a popped balloon on the ground that one of the volunteers had thrown away. He picked it up, 'fixed' it, pumped it and asked me to tie it. He had done this to share with another one of the boys.  As I looked on astonished, he began looking for more of the same. He was looking out for the othe kids. He is 12.

After awhile Matt, Rebecca and Kayla had to catch their flight. This gave me time for my strong sense of sadness to partially subside. We said goodbye and exchanged contact information.

Soon, it was time for our group to move on. I hugged Gabriel and Moises. I told Gabriel to teach Moises English. I hugged Minor, but he seemed preoccupied with helping the other boys. As I made the quick walked to our bus, I could only think to myself, "God, I don't ever want to come here again. I don't want place like this to have to exist.

"Blessed are the meek: for they shall inherit the earth."- Matthew 5:5

Dios es mi guía

Last night, I could not stop thinking of Anahi. When I woke this morning, I prayed that God show me the work I am supposed to do today. I signed up at do prison ministry. Talking with Kristin and my experience with CR made me think it was time for me to try out prison ministry. However, I worried who would be there for Anahi. I'm sure I am not the only one she could connect with. I also know that children require consistency in their lives.

After prayer and discussion with others, I think God wants me to remain with VBS. I let Kristin and Logan know that I was backing out. I felt bad, but there is also plenty of time for me to get involved in prison ministry. There is only a finite time to pit children on God's path as they develop.

The size of our first group was perfect. With roughly 20 kids, we were able to move smoothly through the activities. I befriended Tatiana (12) who helped repeat our memory verse in spanish. She also returned for the second session with friends. The second group had 65 kids, so it was a lot harder to keep order. We had a successful session in spite. We also had a number of returning kids. Those I remember are Perla, Elvia,  Alexandra and Daniella.

Anahi was not present. I was both sad and worried. I hope she has a good life. I hope God holds her tight in his arms and protects her from the evils of this world. It would be wonderful to see her again (now or in the future). Hers is another face I want to see in heaven. God bless her. 

"The Lord bless you and keep you; the Lord make his face shine on you and be gracious to you; the Lord turn his face toward you and give you peace."- Numbers 6:22

Anahi, la timida

Today we held the first day of VBS for the church in Ojojona. I was pumped during breakfast, but as time grew closer I became very tired. Josue, Joel, Karol and Kelin performed the Spanish skit and puppet show. Kristin, Andy, Meredith and I acted as support.

I think Karol and Kelin did a wonderful job. Kelin played the part of Rehab. Karol controlled one of the puppets. They are normally soft spoken, but they put on quite a show. During the two separate sessions, their personalities shined and they kept the group moving.

I got the chance to meet a lot of the kids and had a great time. Each of them own a different part of my recollection. Perla arrived before the everyone and had the opportunity to see rehearsal. She also helped me with Spanish. I met Helen and her brrther, Omar. Helen simply loved her brother and obviously has a knack for taking care of him. I also met best friends- Nazerete and Elvia. Haley was there as well and played with anyone that was around. Karla Isabell Amaya Alverado and Alexandra Martinez Alonzo gave me a challenge when it came to remembering names.

Of all of these, the one that stood out was Anahi. Upon arrival, it was obvious that she was quite afraid and did not want to stay. She came with neighborhood friends Katia (16) and Brayon (1.5). As Katia was trying to get Brayon settled, Anaya was standing outside of the building wanting someone to take her home. She was I tears and pretty scared because as cars whisked by on the street. I saw her and kneeled down, beckoning her to me. She slowly made her way into my arms. I hugged tightly, picked her up and brought her to safety within the church. She buried her face in my shoulder and didn't want to go anywhere else.

Anahi

I asked Katia but she did not know how old Anahi was. Her size she could have been 3 or 4. However, developmentally she was no older than 2. She spoke, but not much. I attribute part of this to fear. However, as time went on, she opened up to a few people. I think she may have a form of autism.

At one point we were playing with the other kids on the playground and she fell. When I checked her out, she had a cut on her toe. With no bandages on site, I had to create one from a napkin and a sticker.  I was happy that she took to me right away.  We had fun together, though we didn't say much.  We just played.  The planned activity was beyond he grasp (or she just wasn't interested) so we played with stickers.  I found it funny that she thought she had to lick them before placing them... all over my face.  Now I shudder.  But I didn't care before.
 
Looking at the condition of her clothes, hair and callused skin I speculate her living conditions are among the worst. I don't think I will ever forget her and our time together. I can't wait to see her again tomorrow.  I pray that she is alright and that she has someone there to love her. 

“And he arose and came to his father. But when he was still a great way off, his father saw him and had compassion, and ran and fell on his neck and kissed him."- Luke 15:20

No lo huele, ahora

Clark and I were chased by dogs on our run. I was fine with running by, but Clark thought they were aggressive. We walked until we passed them, but finished our mile.

Today, we went to the dump. After this, our group split and served as relief for the house building teams. Finally, we spent the time before dinner at Casa de Esperanza.

The dump was nothing like last year. Marc asked that we not bring items for distribution because he does not want inhabitants to think they get stuff whenever a bus arrives. Instead we distributed food and spent time with them. There was a gentleman that I thought was being a menace to our ladies. He was in his fifties and spoke very broken Spanish. When Joel asked me to handle it, so I saw it as an opportunity to work on my Spanish. Twenty minutes later, Karol told me he was drunk and speaking nonsense. Way to go Joel.

Next, we built a home on a secluded farm for a family that was the target of a local gang. They were relocating outside of the city in refuge. The site was shaded well, but tight and muddy. While we were there Melissa (Heidi's sister) caught a baby chick and passed it around for us to hold. It was neat.

We arrived at Casa de Esperanza well before the other group. I spent about 30min in a back room playing with five month old twins  Olman and Josue. Soon Marc arrived and told me it was okay to take Olman outside for the rest of the group. Once outside I also played with Sisi, Hailey and Nohemy as the jumped on the trampoline.

As I observed, a little boy made his way below the trampoline on which the kids jumping. He looked one or two years old. I scooped him up to make him safe. He didn't smile, but sat with a troubling scowl. As Debbie reached for him, he clung to me and buried his face in my chest. He was very shy and very guarded. Anytime someone came by to hold him, they were denied. Then Logan came along. He lit up bright as day. He began laughing and playing with him and did not want to leave him. I could tell Logan had shown him a great deal if love.

This day gave me a glimpse of how a parent feels about work and their children. Before visiting Casa, I was extremely exhausted. I wanted nothing more than to go home, shower and sleep. I was not 'in the mood' to entertain children. However, when we arrived and I saw their carefree, smiling faces my fatigue faded away. It was as if I was never tired.

"But Jesus said, Suffer little children, and forbid them not, to come unto me: for of such is the kingdom of heaven"- Matthew 19:14

Dios, dame tus ojos...

This entry will begin a bit off topic. I was looking at pictures from Micah's baseball tournament on my phone last night. I zoomed into one and  recognized the chain tucked into his jersey. It belonged to the dog tag that I gave him after his baptism.  I had it engraved to read, "Confutatis maledictis, voca me cum benedictis". I wanted him to remember the Holy Spirit, Christ and his Christian brothers are always around him even when he is alone. Baseball players wear charms around the neck as reminders of where their strength comes from.  I am happy that he wears this as his reminder.

Today's events are as follows:

1. Hospital Escuela, School for the Blind and Nueva Oriental
2. The farm
3. The dump

I chose option one and found myself at Hospital Escuela once more. Initially, I was separated from my group.  In spite, I felt very familiar in this place. I stopped at the orthopedic wing and visited six children. Next, I went to the pediatric playground. I found my group preparing balloons and toys and the fun began. I met  Elvira Maria, a two year old girl with pneumonia in isolation. Though she was being released, she was not having a good day. The doctors came in during my visit.  Elvira Maria knew it would not be pleasant. She began crying upon site of the white coats. After the doctors left, Debbie and I returned to comfort her. She was reluctant at first, but she soon warmed up. We were friendly visitors.

Elvira Maria

Alejandra

During other visits, we met Alejandra. She was a patient, but had no signs she was ill aside from her medical bracelet. She took advantage of our attention.  Soon she was laced with fun bracelets, stickers, balloons, nail polish and coloring books. She was so cute that none of us could deny her. I gave her the yellow balloon to match her dress.

After the hospital we visited Escuela para Ciegos. As they were released for recess, we played with them in he courtyard. I met Derrick and gave him greeting from Archer. Following, we went to an indoor assembly area where they sang songs for us and the director played a few Beatles songs on the piano. A little girl sang so beautifully as she led her classmates in a song.

Soon we went back to the courtyard to say goodbye and a little boy came and leaned up to me as if he knew me. His name is Jasper and he is four years old. Some joked and said he was my lost son.

I was excited to visit Nuevo Oriental. I wanted to meet with Kevin, Vanessa and Naomi once more. As time went on everyone talked about seeing their kids again, but mine never showed up. We didn't spend a great deal of time there, but I hoped to see at least one of them. Sadly, it never happened.  It will be at least another year until I see them again.

Devotion was average tonight. Joel spoke and made most people laugh rather than cry. His words definitely pull out emotions. He is gifted far beyond any speaker I know. Next, Marc gave a brief talk; sharing a glimpse of the lack of fortitude the Hondurans have for facing up to authority and the abuse of power. Upon hearing some of the most common offenses, I wanted nothing more but to act. But I didn't know where to begin. I understand it is hard to 'unknow' some of the things we now know.

"But whoso hath this world's good, and seeth his brother have need, and shutteth up his bowels of compassion from him, how dwelleth the love of God in him?"- 1 John 3:17