I am not the same person I was three years ago. This is not a new discovery. I have known that I am different, but as I experience life in Honduras, I realize how much I have changed. 

Sometimes I miss the old me. I miss the me that believed the world was perfect. There was care free innocent boy that spent his summers in the country hiding in fields of gravel mountains. There was the boy that turned flips in piles of leaves. He collected boxes with aspirations of building an airplane and gliding from the balcony outside of his bedroom.

Now, he is gone. He has grown up and has responsibilities. He gets jaded, heart broken and sad about the realities of life. The world is harsh and hard to accept. There have been dreams that have been crushed, pointless suffering, heart break and hardship.

I have not lost all esperanza (hope), but emotions change like the days. I am still growing, still experiencing and still deciding. I don't know what I will be like in the end (if there is an end). I hope that I am able to look back as an old man and say I had life well lived.

Today I worked with Luis and a team of thirteen others. We built a house for a family of six. I was apprehensive because of stories I had heard about Luis. I got the feeling our personalities would clash. I as pleasantly surprised a how well I worked with him. In fact, the entire group liked working with him. According to Marc, Luis loved working with us as well. We finished the house in five hours. I doubt that is a record, but I know we all enjoyed the work.

The father was very grateful and the mother wept the minute she crossed the threshold. Frank gave the grandfather, Allen (partially paralyzed due to stroke), his hat because he had been admiring it so much. This was a good day of work.

"So then neither is he that planteth any thing, neither he that watereth; but God that giveth the increase."- 1 Corinthians 3:7

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